Monday, December 10, 2012

letting go

God has a good plan for my life.
I believe that. But only for my future. I forget that God is working in my life right now. And it is good.
That is hard. Because circumstances don't appear good.
It comes back to trusting God.
Do I trust Him?
Do I believe Him good?
Cognitively? Yes.
In my actions? Not always.
God is teaching me to trust Him. Trust Him to work my life for good.
I have no control. Over anything.
I tried for a long, long time to dictate circumstances and make things go the way I wanted them to go.
Guess what? I can't control my life.
The only thing I have is prayer. Which is so powerful. A lot more powerful than me.
It hurt so bad to realize I couldn't make what I wanted happen.
But I am so glad God brought me to the end of myself.
Now I can stop trying to control.
Now I can trust Him. Completely.

..... for now. I'll blow it again. Soon.

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