Saturday, January 31, 2015

The past few days have been very social. I've seen people I haven't seen in months and it's been good but it has also a given me a lot to mull over. You'll probably be hearing about it soon, although I don't know if I will process it internally or externally. 

Other news, Sam and Maddie got engaged today and I am so excited for them that I can barely stand it. 

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

I withdrew from my Comp II class and I felt so much relief. Even though I am not getting a penny back and I will have a W on my transcript. This weekend I was so stressed out. It wasn't worth it. 

Monday, January 26, 2015

I am going to be dropping my Comp II class. I missed the deadline to get a full refund, but I am hoping they will give my money back anyway. 
I just can't do it all. I can't take two hard classes and three normal ones. I hadn't even considered dropping until I was talking to my family and they urged me to. The lack of stress I feel after making the decision to drop a class is enormous. I wasn't handling it well this weekend. 

Saturday, January 24, 2015

In the previous post, what I was trying to say is, school feels like a royal waste time. I have to spent inordinate amounts of money and spend my so much of my time studying, when I could be out working. I wonder if I have a terrible attitude or am being shortsighted. Maybe I am. But I just don't like it and I feel as though I could be using my time better. 
I just want to do something I love. I don't want to go to school and do homework and study. I hate it. 

Thursday, January 22, 2015

I believe I stood too close to the fire in the fireplace last night and burned my forearm. It's tender to the slightest touch. 

Saturday, January 17, 2015

I believe my greatest running achievement to be the sheer amount of phlegm I am able to spit up while running. 

Thursday, January 15, 2015

peppermint

                                              A moment of calm. 

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Hey, remember when I told you we went on a ski trip? Here's a photo of the group. I'm in the pale green cost close to the middle and Justine is second on the far right in the peach-colored coat. 
Last night the three of us sisters, sat around a card table in front of a fire and played a card game. Only most of the time was spent making strange noises and ludicrous faces at each other. We were acting like 8yo boys and it was hilarious. 

Friday, January 9, 2015

Getting back in bed in the morning, after you've already gotten up is one of the most luxurious things in the world. 

Thursday, January 8, 2015

I think everyone must have given up Pinterest for New Year because it is super dead. 

in kind

My sisters and I went skiing this past week. We went with the neighbors up the street. I didn't know them very well and it was interesting watching them interact as a family. They knew how to have fun together and enjoy one another. It was refreshing. 

I spent a lot of time observing how they treated one another. They had a general kindness toward one another that, frankly, I have no understand of. 

I am not a nice person. I've known that for a long time and I haven't cared. I haven't wanted to change. My attitude was, if you didn't like me you could get over it or ignore me. 

But that's not love. 

Christ has poured out His love on me and my response should be overwhelming gratitude. That thankfulness should be manifested through me loving others. 

I've asked God to make my life hard for the purpose of growing me. I asked with fear and trembling because I know what I'm about to get myself into. 

I want to learn kindness. I don't want to just be kind. That can be faked. I want to know who I am in Christ and what He has done for me and through that have my motivation be a pure, Christ-centered one. 

God is good to me. He shows me grace and mercy. I must respond in kind.